I’ve spent all weekend teaching how to approach. On Thursday, I had a Fearless Flirting tour of London, where I took a group of people around central London, showing them how to approach and naturally start conversations with people. Over the weekend, I wrote content and filmed video for my new e-course, ‘How to Approach People’, and I also spent a few hours, hitting the Marylebone High streets with private clients, and showing them how it works. Because of this intense period I’ve spent with ‘approaching’, I recognise that there are 3 clear points about how to do it properly.
1. Make sure you have enough space: This might seem obvious, but stopping someone in the middle of a busy sidewalk, where loads of people will be blocked, is not the ideal set up. Try and be positioned on the outer sides, or on a less busy street.
2. Watch your body language (and theirs): People respond to subconscious cues that you send out. If you are nervous, they will feel it. If you have your arms crossed, they will feel it. Have your arms resting next to your sides, turn your shoulders to face them, and have a big smile on your face.
3. Don’t take things personally: People are busy, they are often in a hurry, sometimes they are moody. Does this have anything to do with you as a person? Then why are you trying to take it on? Once you have a big enough sample size of practice, and you are the only variable between interactions, you can start learning a lot about the people with whom you speak. They will all be different. Some people will be serious, some will be light-hearted, some won’t speak English. None of this is about you, it’s about them.